Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Old Candy Critic Articles - How to Blow a Bubble

I've decided to take down several old articles from the and re-post them here on the Candy Critic blog.  This week I look back at a classic advertisement that taught me how to blow bubbles.
Online auctions - they can be your best friend or your worst enemy. They can make you rich, or more often make you realize how worthless most of your junk is. Sometimes, however, a piece of junk can turn into something else. It doesn't make you any money, but it teaches you something about life, about love, or most importantly, about candy. Nestled in this Fantasy Masterpieces Number 1, circa 1979 I found a little educational tidbit that will either bring back memories or teach the old ways of candy.

Looking through this gem…
Past the shots of Spiderman selling Twinkies...
Sexy iron-ons...
Even past the skinny guy that's going to get strong and get his girl back....

Looking past all of this I found it...
"Gumfighting do's and dont’s." Back in the day, Hubba Bubba wasn't just about selling gum. No, they were also about educating the world on how, you too, could blow bigger bubbles. Now you can benefit from the wise old ways of the gum chewers of the 1970s. You can blow bubbles that'll make your mother cry. You, my friends, can be further educated in the lost art of giant bubble blowing.
First of all, stance is important. Make sure you bring tools to measure the angle of your arms. And akimbo, darn it! Keep the elbows akimbo!
Keeping the knees slightly bent helps with balance. With large bubbles you never know what might happen. Keeping the feet planted is also important for the same reason.
Size doesn't matter when it comes to bubble blowing. Young or old, small or huge, the big bubble is no longer something you can only dream about... It's a reality that you, too, can achieve no matter what your stature.
We all know the embarrassment of having gum stick to your face, and we know it is less embarrassing to wear a paper bag over the head.

I hope this lesson helps you improve your bubble gum experience and I'm sure you'll notice great improvement and better bubble abilities in no time.


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