This Week In Candy

I'm having an interesting dilemma right now.  It's about a review that I'm thinking of writing for Sour Patch Kids.  Sour Patch Kids is a classic candy that just hasn't made it onto my radar yet for review.  That was until my friend Catherine handed me a bag of them and told me that these Sour Patch Kids were something special.  As it turns out she handed me a bag of Sour Patch Kids from Ireland, and these Sour Patch Kids have 5 different flavours instead of just 4.  So, do you think I should review these Irish Sour Patch Kids?  What do I do when I go back home to the regular Sour Patch Kids, do I review them again?  Just so you know, the extra purple ones are really tasty.

You may have noticed the lack of "Old Candy Critic Articles" being posted on Wednesdays.  Well I've decided to stop posting these old articles because I've pretty much run out.  There are a few that I didn't re-post, but I don't think they're really relevant to the candy world anymore.  I may change my mind, but for now they'll stay in my archives.  I'm looking to fill this gap with something new, I'm just not sure what that new thing will be yet.  I'd like to continue to collect photos of people with candy, or maybe turn the Junk Fud podcast into a weekly thing.

Speaking of the Junk Fud podcast, this week you should keep your ears open this week for a new episode featuring our good friend Mark.  We talk about classic American candy and junk food, as well as look at what international candies Americans are eating.  I've also created a web page where you can find links to all of our past episodes, so if you've missed one you can always find it here.

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Old Candy Critic Articles - Stick it to the man

I've decided to take down several old articles from the candycritic.org and re-post them here on the Candy Critic blog.  This week I'm posting an article I wrote with some candy lessons I had just learned.  Since then I've learned a few more.

What's the appeal of eating something on a stick? What makes something on a stick better than just eating it? Who thought stick = fun? You could look at the history of food to find out that sticks and food have been around forever. As long as man has been cooking, food sticks have been an important part of life. The problem I have with the idea of putting food on sticks comes from the candy world.

Why in the world do so many candies come on sticks? I think the only candy that has to be on a stick is a Popsicle. Why might you ask does the frozen treat deserve to be on a stick? Go into your freezer, put an ice cube in your mouth and don't take it out. Can't do it can you. You have to pull cold things out of your mouth or it hurts.

 Lollipops are okay with me, but not because I think the stick are necessary. If you think about it the idea of taking a candy out of your mouth half way through eating it is kind of gross. Try spitting out your chewing gum after a few minutes, hold it, and then put it back in your mouth, yuck. The lollipop was originally huge and impossible to stick in your mouth in one shot. So you can understand why a stick might help you keep your fingers clean.  You can still find huge lollipops today, but for the most part lollipops fit comfortably in your mouth whole, so the basic principle doesn’t really make sense.

The problem I have comes from the idea of putting things like chocolate, marshmallows, and gummies on sticks. Chocolate and marshmallows on a stick has been around for a while, but the gummy thing has become a new and very strange trend. Whenever I eat a gummy on a stick, all it does is get all gooey and stringy, and if they decorate it little bits of icing fall and sprinkles fall all over the place. The chocolate on a stick is very often cheap chocolate, I'm not saying it's all cheap but for the most part it is. The other problem is that chocolate cracks and when you’re trying to eat it on a stick, it falls all over the place.

Let's face it; just putting something on a stick is not really that creative an idea. If you need the stick by all means use one, but if you’re doing it because you think it's clever to put something new on a stick, you’re wrong. Try something else, we as candy consumers are finished with the stick thing, I want something new and fun not something pointy and long.

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Old Candy Critic Articles - What I've learned

I've decided to take down several old articles from the candycritic.org and re-post them here on the Candy Critic blog.  This week I'm posting an article I wrote with some candy lessons I had just learned.  Since then I've learned a few more.

When I started a website all about reviewing candy, I really didn't think about what I would learn putting this together. I've learned a little about chemistry, a little about geography, and yes even a little about love, but there is so much more that I've picked up putting this page together for so many years. Much of what I learn, I pass onto you. There's no point in letting this information haunt me, and me alone. I feel the need to spread the word that is candy, and torment you with more knowledge than you could ever imagine on the subject. Sometimes I notice little things that really aren't that interesting enough to warrant an article, but I need to fill space so here are some facts I want to share:

1) A good idea to some is not necessarily a good idea.

2) The history of candy is big, and when I say big, I mean big. I'm reading and researching the general history of candy both for my own interest and to better set up the site, and the vastness of the subject is insane.

3) I have never seen a candy that starts with the letter 'U'.  (Update, I’ve now tasted 3)

4) The reason why so many candies are not available in many areas has more to do with labels, than ingredients. One of the most common questions I get is "why some candy can't be found in certain areas". Most people think it has to do with ingredients but for the most part it’s a problem with labelling laws.

5) My grammar and geography skills, although improving, are still pretty bad. So if you see something wrong on the site, please feel free to share it with me.

6) People think I'm an overweight recluse. I don't understand this idea, I put my picture up all over the site, and you can see that I’m not that chubby.

Well I'm still learning and growing, and even loving. So every day I'll keep my eye open for new and fun candy facts and treats so you can continue to read all about the junk I eat.

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Old Candy Critic Articles - Gum-o-fun Part 2

I've decided to take down several old articles from the candycritic.org and re-post them here on the Candy Critic blog.  This week I'm posting the second part of an article all about some of the prizes that come with your gum.  Last week I posted the first part with a few other gums that I sampled.

So you got yourself a nickel? Well not only are you ready to enjoy a neat gum chewing treat but you may enjoy a little entertainment too. Since you only seem to have one nickel and you can only get one of these treats, the folks at Candy Critic want to help you pick out what could be the most important decision of the next five minutes. We're going to open a new door into a world of bubble blowing fun. You've trusted us with your candy choices, now it's time to take a look at entertainment too. So let's look at which one of these gums is both entertaining and tasty.

Looney Tunes

The Gum

Since we all know that there is nothing natural in these gums, at least they should make them interesting. The gum was white and the taste was kind of flavourless. It tasted like.., it didn’t have any taste at all.

Chew Time : 2:52

The Prize

I love the Looney Tunes characters and the representation in this sticker ain't too shabby. This prize is keeper I’m going to stick it to my sketchbook right now.

Spice Girls

I'm not really sure when the flavour ended with this gum, only because it really didn't start. This gum had the strangest flavour and I didn’t really like it that much. It could have been that my gum was a little stale, or just that the gum had no flavour at all.  It would have been cool if they decided to give their gum some spice instead of just being bland.

Chew Time : 4:07

The Prize

Being a guy in my late 20s (now late 30s), you might think that the idea of having a Spice Girls Sticker would make me feel silly.  I have to admit; I'm going to stick this on my notebook right now. Gotta love the Spice Girls.

WCW Gum

The Gum

Stale, this gum is so stale. The WCW no longer exists, so if you find this gum, it will be stale. It does however taste kind of strawberry-like but the strawberry flavour is a little too fake for my liking.

Chew Time : 4:23

The Prize

Dated, but fun is the best way to describe this sticker. I love getting merchandise from wrestlers that have either passed their prime, or that no one remembers. That's what makes this prize kind of neat, but it may not be for everyone.

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Old Candy Critic Articles - Gum-o-fun Part 1

I've decided to take down several old articles from the candycritic.org and re-post them here on the Candy Critic blog.  This week I'm posting part one of an article all about some of the prizes that come with your gum.  Next week I'll post the second part with a few more gums that I sampled.

So you got yourself a nickel? Well not only are you ready to enjoy a neat gum chewing treat but you may enjoy a little entertainment too. Since you only seem to have one nickel and you can only get one of these treats, the folks at Candy Critic want to help you pick out what could be the most important decision of the next five minutes. We're going to open a new door into a world of bubble blowing fun. You've trusted us with your candy choices, now it's time to take a look at entertainment too. So let's look at which one of these gums is both entertaining and tasty.

Bazooka Joe

The Gum

Regular? Sure. But its a little different than other “regulars”, it seems a little more like a strawberry than the classic mint regular flavour you might be used to. The flavour isn't bad, but my memory of this flavour seems like it was better when I was a kid.

Chew Time : 9:26

The Prize

Bazooka Joe is like the modern day Dubble Bubble. It’s colour and the characters and situations are a little more hip. The similarity - they're not really funny. I have to say I like a classic and these comics are nowhere near that.

Dubble Bubble

The Gum

Dubble Bubble is one of those gums that has a classic mint flavour one would expect from a gum marked as regular or original. Whenever you try something that is bubble gum flavoured, this is the flavour you expect.

Chew Time : 7:53

The Prize

These "Funnies" aren't really that funny. I always think to myself, why don't they write really great jokes that make you “dubble” over in laughter? Then one day it came to me, that's not the Dubble Bubble way. In fact there's something very nice about keeping a classic alive even if it’s not funny at all.

Henna Tattoos

The Gum

What flavour is this supposed to be? It's so bland, and really not that interesting at all. This is what plain gum would taste like if gum wasn’t supposed to be fun to eat.

Chew Time : 2:32

The Prize

It didn't go on perfectly, but I still think I look hot now. It's always neat to see popular trend like tattooing turned into a fun toy. The thing is, I always thought that henna was temporary anyway, so I'm not really sure what the point of making temporary Henna Tattoos would be.

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Old Candy Critic Articles - Saver Some Fruit

I've decided to take down several old articles from the candycritic.org and re-post them here on the Candy Critic blog.  This week I'm posting an article I wrote comparing the flavours in Lifesavers to the real fruit.

Fruit, some call it nature's candy; I prefer to call it nature's fruit. Candy is candy, fruit is fruit. It's all pretty simple.

The concept for this article started when I was walking through a fruit market and saw some bananas. I thought to myself, "They don't really make a fruity treat that tastes like real bananas." The reason I say this is I'm a pretty big fan of bananas, but generally hate banana flavoured candies. This got me thinking about how much or little most fruity treats taste like the real thing. We often accept that a certain flavour is what the wrapper tells us it is, but I don't think it's often even close. Or maybe it is.

I rarely find myself indulging in a treat while simultaneously eating the real fruit equivalent. I can't bear the idea that there's a candy experience I have not tried, so here goes. After much thought, I decided that the treat of choice would be Lifesavers. I figure it's the best bet, because it's been around forever, and I think most people reading this probably know what they taste like. I also happen to like every flavour of both Lifesavers and their fruity counterparts, so this allows me to eat treats that won’t make me want to barf.

Most writers tell you to save the best for last, and they're probably right, but unfortunately I've decided to let the pack of Lifesavers decide where I start. The great candy gods have chosen Cherry. 

The interesting thing about cherries is that every time I bite into one, I expect it to taste like the candy version of it. The thing is, it's rare for cherries to be really sweet. No matter how fresh or ripe a cherry is, it always seems to have a bit of a sour kick. That's not bad by any means, but it is something that you don't really remember unless you think about it, and if you think about it, I'm pretty sure you’re not enjoying the cherry as much as you could be.

The Lifesaver is interesting. As I said, it tastes nothing like real cherries, but it tastes like what I'd like cherries to taste like. I have been brought up in a candy world. Here I am writing about how I wish real fruit tasted like candy. I think I need help.

The next choice, as determined by the Lifesavers roll, is Pineapple. This treat has neither pine tree elements nor apple, so it's a little odd if you ask me.

This might be the only really unfair competition out of all of the comparisons. I'm not sure whether the candy or the fruit gets the advantage, but I'm using canned pineapple so it's not really the same as the fresh stuff. I find for the most part it's a little sweeter out of the can, and that seems to be a big difference between the candy versions of most fruits and their real counterparts. The one thing I can say about real pineapple is it's a lot stringer than its candy companion. I've been known to get a bit of the stringy bits stuck between my teeth.

The pineapple Lifesaver has always been a mystery to me. Why pineapple? Why not something a little more common, like banana? It just seems strange. Having said that, the similarities between the fruit (albeit from a can) and the candy are pretty close. I'm impressed; slightly sour but with that unmistakable pineapple taste. Not bad, Lifesavers people, not bad.

Lime is my next choice, or so says the roll.

You're probably thinking, "What kind of idiot would take a bite out of a lime?" Well, I'm just that kind of idiot. Sour. Man oh man is that ever sour, particularly after eating all the sweet pineapple - both the fruit and the candy. I have to be honest. I really did just take a bite and took in more juice than anything else. Man, that's sour. These things are really great with sweet things but on their own they’re not so much fun.

The Lifesaver tastes more like a sweet sparkling cola with lime in it than just a plain lime. Basically, it tastes like they took the flavour of lime and sugared the heck out of it. Once again, another situation where the candy is just an overly sweet version of the original. Not that I really mind, though. I mean, I don't think I could have managed a long suck on something as sour as a lime.

Orange is next. You've got to love a fruit that shares its name with its colour.

I have a love-hate relationship with oranges. It's not that I love to hate them or anything vindictive like that. It's just that if I eat a bad orange, it's the worst thing I can possibly imagine. However, if I eat a good orange, life doesn't get much better than that. Fortunately, this particular orange was a good one. The bad ones are just bitter and make me want to wretch.

With this candy, the sweetness is very similar to the fruit, much like the pineapple. The candy might even be a little sourer, and I don't really mind it. The flavours are similar but you can tell the difference. The real difference comes into play due to the fact that the Lifesaver lacks that rush of juice you get from an orange. Refreshing qualities are big in my book, and in particular fruits like oranges.

Last but not least, Lemon.

If you're wondering whether I'm going to take a bite out of a lemon, please reference the lime section above. I try not to learn from my mistakes. As far as sour goes, see the lime section above and then double it. Wow, that's a sour fruit. I can't say that I've never bitten into a lemon before, because I'm well known for doing stupid things like that, but maybe I just block out how it feels. I hope that if I get the idea to do it again, I'll just reference this blog.

I'm not really sure why they put a lemon and a lime Lifesaver in this package; I think they taste virtually the same. I'm sure it has something to do with looking like a rainbow, but then that begs the question of why they have pineapple instead of grape or blueberry. Taste-wise, the difference between the lemon and lime flavoured Lifesavers isn't that big, similarly with the fruit. In fact, many fruit-flavoured treats have "lemon lime" flavours and I can see why - the flavours are not that different. The strange thing is that out of all the flavours, these two are the most different from their fruit counterparts. Maybe that's not strange or even that interesting, but it's worth mentioning.

Any last notes, you might ask? Well, for the record, I do really enjoy fruit, even though you probably imagine me just eating tonnes of candy all the time.

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Old Candy Critic Articles - Kinder Fun

I've decided to take down several old articles from the candycritic.org and re-post them here on the Candy Critic blog.  This week we look at an article I wrote exploring a fun little basket of Kinder treats.

So it's Easter and what's the greatest part about Easter? It’s really one of the best examples for a holiday that brings fun and candy together. This is the time of year that candy has to be fun. If it’s as simple as hunting for chocolate eggs, or a cool and crazy candy in a basket, Easter is all about playing with your treats. So what does the Candy Critic do to celebrate this type of holiday? Well I go to the folks that make "Kinder Surprise" and pick up an Easter fun type basket. Wondering if it's the treat for you? Well look no further as we present; Candy Critic looks at the "Easter Kinder Mix" pack.

Kinder Surprise

Nothing says fun more than the word “surprise”, and nothing is more surprising than the prize you might find in a Kinder Surprise. I say this with much honesty, only because some of the prizes are a little strange. Covered in great chocolate and always filled with cool prizes, this is one of the treats I always go for when I'm in a bad mood. Since Easter is all about making sure you’re in a really good mood this treat fits the bill.

Here's a picture of my prize:

Kinder Choko-Bon

Kinder Choko-Bon is what you might call interesting. As usual the chocolate is great quality, a regular trait in Kinder treats. This one has either a white really light nougat or a white chocolate filling, with little wafer or nutty bits. I like it since nothing is better than a bite into something with a little texture surprise.

Kinder Bar

If you like the chocolate on the ever popular Kinder Surprise then get yourself a whack of these. This is basically the egg without the prize. Well that and it's rectangular not oval and it's not hollow. Okay so it's not really like the egg at all, but the chocolate is great and there's no chance of biting into a prize.

Kinder Hippo

Of all the treats in Kinder collection, this is the only one I've never sampled before. I'm not sure if they're new, but they’re new to me. So here goes… Holy cow, these are great!  It's like a light tasting "Nutella" cream inside a wafer Hippo. How many times in your life can you say, "wafer Hippo"? It's not bad, like all Kinder treats the creamy stuff is high quality and smooth, and everything about it says fun. If you can find a Kinder Hippo, try it out you might like it. My only problem is they appear to be rather fragile, I got two in this Kinder pack, and they were both busted.

As a bonus here's my Hippo getting lassoed by my Kinder Surprise prize:

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Old Candy Critic Articles - No more mint, please.

I've decided to take down several old articles from the candycritic.org and re-post them here on the Candy Critic blog.  This week we look at an article I wrote when I was being over run with minty candies.

Last year the big announcement in the candy world was that 'mint' was going to be the next big thing, the world is going to be all about the mint, and candy fans all over are nuts about the mint. I think there might be a grain of truth to this. Sure, I enjoy a mint or mint gum regularly, in fact I generally carry some sort of mint product with me all of the time. If you see me on the street, go ahead and ask me for one I'll bet I'll have one to share. So the truth is out, mint is a great treat but is it the next big thing. Is it the candy of tomorrow?

Well first of all I don't think the mint really went away, it's been around since the dawn of the confectionery market, and I think it's been pretty popular since it's conception. My grandparents used to always give me mints, they were mint people. In fact, almost every elderly person I know digs the mints. Does this mean that my and the next generation are a bunch of old softies, we want old people’s candies?

My final problem with the mint craze is a problem I find with any candy craze, it always goes too far. When gross out candy was cool, eventually it just got candy that was so nasty it was inedible. When the sour trend was at its peak, I do believe it’s gone down a bit; everything had to be sour no matter what it was. The candy industry has to give itself some boundaries. I know I'm preaching to a bunch of marketing business types that do know more about trends than me, but please, do we really need mint flavoured soda.

There I said it and you know who you are. Mints are great. Nothing is better after a garlic-filled meal than a refreshing mint. And hey for those people out in the world that can't eat sugar, the mint is one of the only alternatives even the sugar-crazed Candy Critic goes for. I just think that mint has its place in the candy world. I understand and respect the idea of candy companies being creative, but ask yourself before you start marketing mint in everything: “Does someone want to eat this minty treat, or am I just being creative for creative sake?”

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Old Candy Critic Articles - Easter Eggs

I've decided to take down several old articles from the candycritic.org and re-post them here on the Candy Critic blog.  This week we look at an old article I wrote dealing with the huge variety of chocolate filled eggs available on the market.

It's that time of year again; time to enjoy another egg from the Easter bunny. Wait a minute; does the Easter bunny lay eggs? This doesn't seem right at all.  On the other hand, I don't think I would want anything that a regular rabbit would produce.

Whether from a chicken, a factory, or the Easter Bunny, chocolate eggs are great. The shape is simple, and you can fill it with all kinds of crazy things. Well being the candy experts we are, we decided to take a look at a bunch of different eggs on the market and let you know which are Grade A and which are just scrambled.

Dove

Mars

The chocolate in this egg is nice and smooth. Although there wasn't anything interesting inside, the quality of the chocolate was okay, so it wasn't that bad. The part that I'm not to sure about has to be the fact that it's actually two halves of an egg and not one egg. I can’t understand why they would do this, it's not like you can re-wrap the other half and save it for later since the foil always rips. And it's not like I want to anyway, who eats just one half of a chocolate egg? This isn't a huge snack; it's easily a one sitting snack. So it's not bad but it's just nothing spectacular.

Caramilk

Cadbury

Messy, that is one of the words I would use to describe the Cadbury Caramilk Egg. Not only was there a little caramel dripping out before I even bit into it, but as soon as I did the caramel went everywhere. This treat tasted good, as good as a Caramilk bar, but it left my mouth so phlegmy that I instantly had to chug a glass of water just to get some balance. The caramel to chocolate ratio is okay; I just think it's a little too much of both together.

Creme Egg

Cadbury

Of all of the eggs mentioned, this one is truly the classic Easter treat. As long as I can remember these have been staples of my Easter diet. I always thought it was cool to have a chocolate egg that was kind of the same size as a real egg, maybe a little smaller, with a candy like yolk and egg whites. When I ate this egg I did notice one thing that I never really thought of before, what flavour is the centre? It's not that it’s bad; it's just a mystery. As with all of the Cadbury eggs, the chocolate was great and the filling smooth.

Harry Potter "Dragon Eggs"

Master Food UK

This egg was probably one of the most original eggs so far. Again like every other, it made me so amazingly thirsty, but the inside was a little creamier than some of the other eggs and there were two colours so it was kind of cool. The greatest thing was the little gummy in the middle. I'm told it was a little dragon and I guess it kind of looked like one. I'm not a big fan of orange and chocolate, particularly synthetic orange and chocolate, and that's just what this had. So I have to say that the flavour wasn't the highlight, but for novelty this thing was pretty cool.

Dream

Cadbury

I must say that this egg was a bit of a surprise to me. I'm not fanatical about white chocolate, and for the most part unless purchased in a high quality store, white chocolate is gross. This treat however held up. I was expecting trouble and I got pure joy. I'm not too sure, but I think most of the 'joy' came from the stuff in the centre. The outside chocolate seemed like standard white chocolate, but the centre truffle-like filling was great. I can't say this was my favourite egg, but it was surprisingly good.

Mars

Mars

Seeing as this is the only entry into the competition by Mars, and one of the few non-Cadbury eggs, I figured that any change would be welcome. I have to say that although the change was good, it really didn't seem to have the quality of some of the other eggs. The chocolate seemed a little cheap and the caramel was a little flat. Having said that, I found that this one really didn't make me as thirsty as the other eggs. This egg also had the split in two feature, which is fine if your sharing but it really isn't great for saving, what do you wrap it in after eating just half? If you've eaten way too many of the other egg, and your looking for a change, then you've found it, just be careful what you wish for.

Truffle

Cadbury

I've started to notice something doing all of these chocolate egg reviews; a glass of water is always needed. A chocolate egg with a chocolate interior may seem a little strange but it's not that bad. It is a lot of chocolate, but the stuff in the middle is classy truffle cream, so it's not bad. The cream makes this egg seem a little classier than other eggs. I wish I knew why they call it truffle, I mean isn't a truffle a mushroom? Not one of the more creative eggs of the bunch but fine in its simplicity.

Wunderbar

Cadbury

I was kind of wondering how they would manage the multi-level treat that is a Wunderbar in an egg format. It seemed to work pretty well. The peanut butter was in the centre with the caramel and chocolate surrounding it. The ratio of chocolate was a little higher than in the regular Wunderbar, but I really didn't mind that at all. Actually it seemed to make it work a little better than the bar. I always thought that the peanut butter in the original bar was a little much, but this works. I think the only strange thing has to be calling it a Wunderbar, as it is not a “bar” at all.

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Old Candy Critic Articles - How to be a Smartie Pants

I've decided to take down several old articles from the candycritic.org and re-post them here on the Candy Critic blog.  This week's article is one I wrote a while back looking at the difference between American and UK/Canadian Smarties.

It's about time someone got the record straight. Now you may have read some things on this site that just didn't make any sense to you. In fact, this was something that until I started this site didn't even know. Now your probably saying to yourself, get to the point buddy, I have other candy related things to read about. My point is this, what is a "Smartie". Oh you think you know, your sitting in your chair saying everybody knows what a "Smartie" is, don't they. Well, you’re partially right. Many people do know what a "Smartie" is, but depending on where your from, your answer might be totally different from another person. So I've decided to make it clear for everybody, strap on your... well what ever you wear when you eat "Smarties", you just might learn something.

I think the best way to start this is to explain the concept of Smarties as simply as I can. In this great blue marble we live on there are two types of "Smarties". There are those that are chocolate with a candy coated shell and ones that look like little sugar pills that are all stacked up and rolled together. Now some of you are confused, you are most likely people that don't live in Canada, because unlike many other countries Canada is blessed with both. Although if you were to ask a Canadian what a "Smartie" is, they would say the chocolate with a candy shell, but they would understand that there’s an American version too.

So now that I've completely confused you, here is a little profile of each treat:

The chocolate with the candy shell.

For all you American, this is what many people call Smarties.   These are similar to "M&M's" in that they are little chocolate disks with a candy shell. But, if you look a little closer you can really find a lot of differences between these treats. 

M&M tends to go with filling their treat with something special, like peanuts or almonds or whatever is in those crunchy ones. Smarties are more about flavoured chocolate in the centre. Smarties have just introduced a new flavour called Sundae, and when you get the giant Smarties the orange ones are orange flavoured. Speaking of Giant Smarties, size is something that they interestingly went on opposite sides of the spectrum. M&M's went tiny, while Smarties went giant. Both are great and each are worth trying. Other than that the colours do vary a little, although nowadays they each offer specialty colours all the time, particularly M&M's.

So this is how it goes, Smarties are a lot like M&M's; small, round disks of chocolate covered in colourful candy shells. They generally come in either a tube or a box and are great for decorating cakes. From what I know you can find this variety of Smarties in Canada and the UK wherever you buy standard chocolate bars.

The sugar pills wrapped in cellophane all lined up.

Some people know these treats as "Rockets" as well, but to many Americans if you say "Smartie" this is what they expect. These are the staple of every Halloween diet, as I've said in the past, "you will get a roll of these if you go out for Halloween". Not that it’s a bad thing. These tangy little treats are great; they have a tangy zip and leave a powdery feeling in your mouth. As far as variety goes these things don't really have much to offer, the only variation I've ever seen is really long rolls and really short rolls.

I guess if you have to compare these with another snack I might look in the direction of the "Sweet Tart", but really they are something of a unique treat. Having said that so many companies make a version of these that you do see them around a lot all over the world.

So there you go, if you ask for a "Smartie" in the USA, and you don't get what you expected, this just might be why. I hope you've learned something because learning about candy is almost as fun as eating it.

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Old Candy Critic Articles - The 'Key Lime' Conspiracy

I've decided to take down several old articles from the candycritic.org and re-post them here on the Candy Critic blog.  This week we an old article I wrote when I found out that many companies didn't use real key lime juice in their key lime candies.

Lies, lies, it's all lies. One of the worst things in the world is a lie, and in the candy world it’s no different. One of the worst lies has to be the great 'key lime' conspiracy. Simple it is, but evil? You better believe it.

One of the most interesting flavours used today has to be lime. Sometimes it’s used instead of lemon just to give a treat a bit of originality. It's great especially when it’s real limejuice because real limes do have a great unique flavour and can always add a great twist to any treat. But there are bad people in the world. People who feel it is okay to lie. These evil people think that everybody out in the world are idiots, morons all of them. That's what some of these candy companies think, when it comes to.... What the heck was I talking about? Oh yeah, limes.

Have you ever enjoyed a treat that was labelled “key lime” and thought to yourself, "I guess key limes are just like any other lime." or maybe that “key lime” is probably just a style of flavouring for pie. Well, its not! A key lime is a unique lime with a special flavour, and people you are getting ripped off. I'm here to blow the whistle on candies that claim to be “key lime” flavoured but don’t actually have a drop of key lime in them.

People... read the label. If it says “key lime”, check the ingredients. If there are no key limes in it, you are getting ripped off. Stand up and unite against the fake key limes. Key limes are so good and it’s about time we got what we paid for.

If you ever do get the chance, you should try a fresh key lime and if you're even luckier you might find a candy with real key lime in it.

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Old Candy Critic Articles - Does size matter?

I've decided to take down several old articles from the candycritic.org and re-post them here on the Candy Critic blog.  This week we look at candy size and how it affects the way a treat might taste.

The other day I saw something really interesting in my local 24-hour convenience store that started to make me think. What I saw, and eventually purchased, was Mars Bar Bits. What did it make me think of is, does size really matter when it comes to chocolate bars? I've come to an interesting conclusion about this, sometimes it does and sometimes it doesn't.

Let me break it down for you, some bars work small and some work large. Let's look at my new found discovery Mars Bar Bits. I'm not a huge fan of regular Mars Bars, there not bad but I rare ever crave one. I tried these little bits and you now what? They were a lot better, and I think it was the size that really made the difference. It could have been the extra chocolate (with smaller bits you have more surface area) or it could be that I find the Mars Bar to be a little overwhelming in the nougat department.

This brings us to when bars go big. Why do I like some bars big you might ask? Well that is a much easier question to answer. I'm a pig. Sometimes 4 sticks of a Kit Kat aren't enough, I want 12, so I go for the big bar. The drawbacks are simple, if you eat a gigantic chocolate bar you will be both fat and sick. I guess you could share it with friends, but what's the fun in that. The real mystery is why these giant sizes are most commonly found in theater concession stands. I know I'll be there for at least a couple of hours, but 4 pounds of chocolate covered almonds can still be too much.

So let's review, some bars in their natural state are too much or not balanced properly so a smaller variation can change everything and even make it better. Big bars are great for the average glutton, but if the dosage is too much it can be hazardous to your health. I guess the best way to judge this is simple, on Halloween, instead of giving out small treats, give out large bars, and see how many repeat trick or treaters you get. If you are planning this test please email your home address, and I'll see you on Halloween.

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Old Candy Critic Articles - Candy in the low Carb zone.

I've decided to take down several old articles from the candycritic.org and re-post them here on the Candy Critic blog.  This week we look at an old article from Allison where she looks at low carb version of popular bars.

As low-carbohydrate lifestyles gain popularity, there are more and more options for low-carb treats available in the marketplace. I have been on the Atkins plan for about a year now, and even within that time, I’ve noticed that low-carb snacks are getting better and and more plentiful.

A year ago, for treats I could get some muffin mixes, Atkins brand protein bars that were kind of chocolatey, and … well … raspberries and strawberries. Now, I can get chocolate bars, cookies, fudge-sicles, pudding, ice cream sandwiches, and even granola bars! (Not that raspberries and strawberries aren’t great.)

At first, I was pretty skeptical. Could you really enjoy sweet deliciousness without sacrificing your health goals? Yes, there are some downsides to the low-carb treat revolution. Expense is one thing. Even the “Atkins Baking Mix”, a flour substitute, is something like $17 in health food stores for a tin of about 4 cups. I found it once in a grocery store for $3.69. They don’t sell it anymore.

And soy flour? Not for making sweet treats. Trust me – I’ve tried.

After I finished Atkins’ “induction” phase and had been in the “ongoing weight loss” phase for about two months, I decided I needed a treat. Atkins “Advantage” bars were all I could really get then. Those and Ketogenics muffin mixes. (I recommend the chocolate chip.) In my opinion, the Atkins muffin mixes are terrible. “Advantage” bars aren’t so tasty either, but when you haven’t had anything sweet for 2-½ months, you take what you can get.

To sweeten these treats (and the new “Endulge” treats they’ve since released), the Atkins people use something called maltitol. Maltitol is a polyol, or sugar alcohol, which is a kind of hydrogenated carbohydrate used as an artificial sweetener. According to www.freedictionary.com some common sugar alcohols are:
· Mannitol
· Sorbitol (Some cell damage may be related to too much sorbitol in the cells of the eyes and nerves.)
· Xylitol (Good for preventing tooth decay.)
· Maltitol
· Lactitol

Polyols are good in that you can sweeten things without the carbohydrates absorbing into the body and making us all fat (or perhaps marathon runners). But what they don’t tell you is that they can have a laxative effect. Most sources claim that you have to ingest large quantities for this to happen, but my experience is quite different.

I’ve never really been a gassy person, but when I started on Atkins I became a next-to-zero emissions person. But then, when I started eating the things sweetened with polyols, I became a veritable methane factory. As for the laxative effect? If I ate treats two days in a row, things would come out like soft-serve ice cream. Anything more than two days in a row, you’re looking at a slushy. Is it really worth the mediocre sweets? At the time, yes.

Then, in the U.S., Hershey’s, Keebler, and Nabisco SnackWells got in on the game with chocolate bars and cookies. Hershey’s even makes low-carb Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups. They taste almost exactly the same as the “real” ones although a little dry, and not at all like the Atkins peanut butter cups, which have a bit of a strange taste in them (but again, OK in a pinch, if you don’t mind the soft-serve ice cream effect). The Hershey’s chocolate bars are about 1/3 the size of their regular ones, but they are delicious. I especially like the one with the little rice crisps, which I dip into chunky (peanut-only) peanut butter.

These treats are sweetened with other names of sweeteners that I don’t recognize, but could also very well be polyols. Hershey’s uses erythritol, and Nabisco uses acesulfame potassium in their SnackWells CarbWell cookies. Sounds terrible, tastes great. Also, less soft-serve ice cream effect, and far less methane production. AND, they’re about as expensive as regular chocolate bars, so less gouging at the cash register.

I hope they decide to bring them to Canada soon.

There are lots of other low-carb treats that I’ve tried, and I recommend experimenting around. Some of them are GeniSoy’s Low Carb Crunch, Breyer’s ice cream sandwiches, Sobey’s store-brand low-carb fudge-sicles, Odyssey “Slim Advantage” chocolate bars, and Atkins granola bars. All of these are available in Canada, and I’m sure most of them in the U.S. as well.

The very best treats I’ve found, though? Those little miniature “real” chocolate bars that weigh about 5 grams each. They can’t possibly have more than 5 grams of carbohydrates since that’s they’re weight, and you get to eat the real thing, provided you can stop at just one. I’ve also been known to enjoy the occasional Timbit doughnut hole at Tim Horton’s. They probably have a few more carbohydrates, but I just make sure I walk to the farthest Tim Horton’s possible and burn it off.

So where am I after almost a year? Looking and feeling healthy and happy, and enjoying some of the treats out there.

Allison

Old Candy Critic Articles - Is Red a Flavour?

I've decided to take down several old articles from the candycritic.org and re-post them here on the Candy Critic blog.  This week we look at candy companies that insist on naming their candy's flavours based on their colours.

Ahhhhh novelty, one of the key ingredients in any great treat, at least sometimes it can be. I've noticed a new novel trend lately, and I'm not too sure how to deal with it. Several companies have been creating red flavoured treats, not cherry or fruit punch but "red” flavoured.

It's important that we make sure somebody doesn't know something I don't. I'm going to make some assumptions, if you know differently please let me know and I will retract this statement: Orange is both a fruit and a flavour, so right off the bat have established a "grey area". Grape, Lemon, and Pineapple, although with some exceptions (when it comes to house paints) are fruit and not colours. Purple, Yellow and Red as far as I know are colours. Wait a minute, is red a flavour too?

To be honest, when I was a kid, I would never ask for the cherry or grape Popsicle, I would ask for the red or purple Popsicle. Having said that, on the package it is clearly marked as “cherry” or “grape”. So could mean one of two things; either most people used "red" as a description for the Popsicle and I was just using the colloquialism for the product. It could also be that I was the only person in the world doing this and I'm either an idiot or a creative genius. Well now that we’ve established that “red” is used as a flavour context, let's look at whether or not a candy company can just label a candy "red” favoured.

I think it's all right, but only sometimes. For example, if you attach another word with it, like berry, then it’s perfectly fine. Nothing wrong with Berry Red, in fact I believe it's a well-established Kool Aid flavour. I guess this isn't a good example though because it does imply the flavour, by using the word berry. You understand that there are red berries, and then this flavour is most likely a combination of these red berries.

It just seems like some products are trying to sell the colour of their products, rather than sell the flavour. It is a scientific fact that people tend to buy more candies and treats when it has a lot of red on the package, but does it sell if the flavour is red as well?

I guess I'm not really hip to the idea of candy being labelled by colour instead of flavour. Although I've tried many of the "red flavoured" treats and you know what, they tasted red. Some I could place like a cherry or fruit punch, but some just tasted red. It just comes across as lazy to me, are candy companies afraid that they might mislabel a flavour?  Or does red actually have a flavour in our minds; do blind people see red when they eat a red flavoured treat?

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Old Candy Critic Articles - Valentine’s Day the Japanese Way

I've decided to take down several old articles from the candycritic.org and re-post them here on the Candy Critic blog.  This week we look back at an article Allison wrote about how they celebrate Valentines Day in Japan.

Here in North America, when Valentine’s Day rolls around my girlfriends are either pining away about not having a boyfriend/girlfriend, or hoping that their partner will do something fabulous. Or at least that he hasn’t forgotten that the day exists.


Women in Japan, however, take matters into their own hands. Valentine’s Day there is not so much about who loves whom, but rather, it’s there for women to give chocolate to the men in their lives. These men can be boyfriends and husbands, sure, but also co-workers, bosses, or even “just friends”. Giving chocolate to a man on Valentine’s Day is in no way a declaration of a crush. It’s just a way to celebrate whatever the relationship is that exists.


Sounds a little fishy, I bet. I mean, these poor women spend their (considerably lower, usually,) salaries on chocolate for these men who just sit back and receive, right?

But wait. Japan has one more “love holiday” that we don’t. It’s called “White Day”, and happens exactly one month later, on March 14. This is when all men who received chocolate on Valentine’s Day can return the favour. Traditionally the return gift is a cookie (not one from a store-bought bag, mind you, but something nice). However, the gift can really be anything, including perfume or jewellery (the latter being the gift of choice of most of my Japanese girlfriends).

It is a system that I, personally, enjoy. There is none of the “will-he-or-won’t-he” doubt, and most certainly none of the “if-I-give-him-something-will-he-misinterpret-it” conundrum. Not to mention the “I-don’t-have-a-boyfriend-so-Valentine’s-sucks” lament. In Japan, it’s just a fun pair of holidays where people who know each other give each other goodies. And if I end up with some nice jewellery in exchange for a few chocolates, well, who am I to complain?

by Allison

Old Candy Critic Articles - How to Blow a Bubble

I've decided to take down several old articles from the candycritic.org and re-post them here on the Candy Critic blog.  This week I look back at a classic advertisement that taught me how to blow bubbles.

Online auctions - they can be your best friend or your worst enemy. They can make you rich, or more often make you realize how worthless most of your junk is. Sometimes, however, a piece of junk can turn into something else. It doesn't make you any money, but it teaches you something about life, about love, or most importantly, about candy. Nestled in this Fantasy Masterpieces Number 1, circa 1979 I found a little educational tidbit that will either bring back memories or teach the old ways of candy.

Looking through this gem…

Past the shots of Spiderman selling Twinkies...

Sexy iron-ons...

Even past the skinny guy that's going to get strong and get his girl back....

Looking past all of this I found it...

"Gumfighting do's and dont’s." Back in the day, Hubba Bubba wasn't just about selling gum. No, they were also about educating the world on how, you too, could blow bigger bubbles. Now you can benefit from the wise old ways of the gum chewers of the 1970s. You can blow bubbles that'll make your mother cry. You, my friends, can be further educated in the lost art of giant bubble blowing.

First of all, stance is important. Make sure you bring tools to measure the angle of your arms. And akimbo, darn it! Keep the elbows akimbo!

Keeping the knees slightly bent helps with balance. With large bubbles you never know what might happen. Keeping the feet planted is also important for the same reason.

Size doesn't matter when it comes to bubble blowing. Young or old, small or huge, the big bubble is no longer something you can only dream about... It's a reality that you, too, can achieve no matter what your stature.

We all know the embarrassment of having gum stick to your face, and we know it is less embarrassing to wear a paper bag over the head.

I hope this lesson helps you improve your bubble gum experience and I'm sure you'll notice great improvement and better bubble abilities in no time.

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Old Candy Critic Articles - Gummy Trouble

I've decided to take down several old articles from the candycritic.org and re-post them here on the Candy Critic blog.  This week I look at a box of gummies that really ticked me off.

Now is the time for the Candy Critic to rant. For the most part I'm pretty positive about all candy, and I'd never tell anybody not to try or purchase anything even if I didn't like it. But there is one unforgivable candy no-no, and that is ripping people off. Recently, I went to my local candy store to check out any new treats that may have come out. When I got there, I started to go on a candy buying rampage. One of the treats that came out of this was the "Austin Powers Sour Gummies". I'd seen them before but since they're a little bit expensive I always waited, but this was going to be the day.

That's night when I got home, I decided to take some candy pictures for the site, and these gummies were on my list. I was soon-to-be very disappointed. When I opened the gummies, I discovered that the box was full of gummy bears, plain gummy bears. I'm not saying I don't like them, but considering how much I paid and the creative possibilities of "Austin Powers Sour Gummies" I was very disappointed. So my beef is simple:

First of all I paid a lot for these gummies, I'm not saying that I've never paid a lot for candy in my life. With the cost of shipping some of the candy I've sampled is worth its weight in gold. If I get something cool, I'll pay for it, and have no problems with that. The problem I have is paying for something that doesn't seem worth it. With a little help from my local candy store, I calculated that I paid almost 3 times as much as I would have paid for the same amount of gummy bears. I mean "Austin Powers" is great but I don't think the box is worth that much.

This leads me to my second problem; "Austin Powers" is a creative collection of films using icons from the past and present to make light of current situations. Now that you've heard my little movie speech here's how it pertains to this. Why don't they make custom gummies instead of just giving me gummy bears? I've got a section of this site dedicated to the diversity of gummies and they couldn't think of any cool shapes or ideas for these gummies. The movie is full of ideas. Right off the top of my head, I thought it would be cool if they did male and female symbols. Anything would be better than, well nothing.

I'm not telling you not to buy these gummies; I would never tell anyone not to try something out. I'm just telling you how I felt when I experienced this particular treat.

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